Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Harpo's Words: the Poetry of Petty Politics

Buckdog's reprint of Radwanski's stellar piece on why Harpo remains a petty politician got me thinking: must everything Harpo does be tainted by enmity?

I mean, is it impossible for this small man to even try to rise to the occasion? To speak great words? Apparently not. One just has to read Radwanski to see why:

" ... true that the Prime Minister probably could have offered a little more empathy to Canadians suffering the effects of the recession, .... It's also true that the rah-rah boosterism rings a little hollow.... what the government is doing ... doesn't exactly fill you with confidence....

[Then, Harpo] .... out of nowhere, ... proceeded to announce that he's "been very frustrated with the opposition since the election," ... and encouraged his audience to tell the dastardly Liberals that it's time to "stop the political games."

This was possibly the sincerest part of Harper's speech; he absolutely loves this stuff. But it also undermined everything else he was trying to accomplish.

Set aside that his attacks weren't all that grounded in reality ... they serve to cast the entire thing in a different light.

Suddenly, it's no longer about rallying Canadians around a common purpose; it's about positioning himself against his opponents, about scoring points that nobody should be tallying right now."

After reading Buckdog, I then ventured over to Impolitical who also nailed it perfectly when he said Harpo's speech was: "Missing in tone ... the hope, the inspirational pitch." Well, I can't add much more to that. But here's some bad poetry anyway to go with the bad politics we witnessed yesterday:

A Harpo Lament

Thin lips, dead eyes
speech is empty,
full of lies

Action late
we do despise
the hate, the partisanship
above which you cannot rise

Times are tough
you now admit
But not as tough
as that of other poor shits
"Don't worry, we're doing better," you do say -
"at least we don't suck as bad as the US of A!"
Oblivious to the pain in your midst
Your words Harpo are again amiss

Your response to those who query
your $3 Billion stance
"It's not my fault the opposition won't dance
Blame them!
Don't you see?
Their responsible for all that ails you, and ME.
Don't ya know, its red-tape all
opposition's fault if we fail and fall."

Cold comfort for we -
when we need a leader most
Harpo's you're no Obama -
you're not even close

So sad
too bad
you are one
incapable of rising to the level
of another country's son

Too bad (again so sad)
you try so hard -
always playing your political card

Harpo, you're so chilled, so empty
you're such a void
empathy missing
partisan pissing
All the while you fail to see
what we really need ... is simply someone to believe!

Pray tell Harpo,
next time, after spouting your rage
and before you leave the stage
Pray tell, tell us you believe in something more
than the power of a sweater
and pussy galore

Cause this time
you know
it's about more than a cat and knitted yarn
it's about honesty and hope...
and having a fucking leader who gives a Good God-darn!

You know that Harpo? Don't you?


  1. Glad to see you're still around, churning out such... delightful... poetry! :)

  2. @ Rachel,

    Yeah, still around - just was out of town for a bit & am insanely busy with work, life, kids, dog & our obligatory rodent (the damn hamster)!

  3. Maybe the hamster needs some rodent company, then he/she wouldn't be so demanding! ;)

  4. Rachel,

    Maybe, but my asthma is barely manageable as is. Another rat may very well spend the end of me. Dog and rat we have is bad enough!

  5. Or you could quit smoking and get more pets. You can see where my priorities lie. ;)

  6. "Empty." That's Harper.

    Nice to see you back! Rodents...with asthma? Oh, thats so dangerous!

    You can always get a snake. Nice pet, could take care of that rodent problem as well. :)