Thursday, August 27, 2009

Friday, August 21, 2009

Harpo's World and Tourism: Talk about a disconnect!

[Atlantic OnLine, August 21, 2009]

Harpo: “Tourism is an increasingly important industry ... in every region of our country ...,” said the Prime Minister. “Our Economic Action Plan makes several major investments to strengthen this vital sector.”


Globe & Mail: "... June numbers showing that travel to Canada from the United States fell to its lowest level since Statistics Canada started tracking cross-border trips in 1972."

Hey Harpo - your lame ass Tory PR game is getting tired. So excuse me while I (yet again) blow more incredulous snot out my nose because of your empty tactics. Facts and figures not going your way? "Oh, don't worry," your minions say, "we'll just do a news release that pretends otherwise."

Jesus! Give us a break!

“Our Economic Action Plan makes several major investments to strengthen this vital sector”??

Sorry, can you say that again? It's the third week of August asshole!

“As Canadians, we must set aside our modesty and do all we can to sell the amazing tourist experiences that exist in our own backyard." Shouldn't you have been all over this file BEFORE the season began? Exactly how has YOUR government's Economic Action Plan helped so far? Did you coordinate a national 'sell' program with the provinces that we are unaware of? Did Tourism Canada really take the lead in trying to attract more US visitors here this summer? Well... (numbers to contrary) did it?

Evidence, please?

Please, give us some e'ffn evidence!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Harpo plays G.I. Joe

It's official, Harpo gets off on playing with G.I. Joe's. Wonder if he also has a 'kung-fu grip'.

The text along the bottom was shopped in - the 'thumbs up', t... on Twitpic

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Bill Clinton does Cdn taxpayer's orally!

Gracious me, talk about an engorged and erroneous stimulus?

According to CTV, the $175,000 price tag for former US President Bill Clinton's upcoming speech at Toronto's CNE will:

"... partially be covered by a portion of the Marquee Tourism Events program, a controversial federal stimulus fund that can deliver up to $3 million for a single event. [...] "A part of Clinton's fee is being paid for by taxpayers, and a part of it is being paid for by ticket purchasers. What a great use of stimulus money,' David Bednar, general manager of the CNE, told CTV News."

Jesus! Politics aside, when did Harpo & Co. announce the federal economic stimulus package was going to be used to feather the financial bed's of fabulously famous foreign multi-millionaires? Did I miss something in the budget?

Are we getting buggered on this deal... eer what?

Stimulus, my arse!

Monday, August 10, 2009

One-Humped Aussie Orifices Soon To Eat Lead

Last December I came across a tidbit about Australia's exploding camel population entitled: If You Can't Beat Them, Eat Them. A curious piece, the article was chalk full of info on the estimated million-plus feral camels running amok Down Under. Apparently this booming Aussie camel population is threatening fragile ecosystems and endangering both indigenous species and rare plants. Also, it turns out the camel's asshole is (I kid you not) a dangerous orifice whose gaseous emissions contributes to global warming. Further, these even-toed ungulates really like to... um, err, well hump like rabbits. In fact, they are humping so much that their population doubles every nine years.

"Wow," I said at the time, "horny humping camels, who would thunk it?" Also, who would have thunk that a study on the environmental threat posed by the camels to an already kangaroo polluted habitat would recommend "the best way to bring down the quickly multiplying population is to add the one-humped ferals to the human food chain." Certainly not I.

An "excellent health food" it was said. The meat, "lean as lean" was compared to filet mignon and, we were told - "Word has it ... that the hump is the tastiest part; so delicious is the mound of fatty tissue that some people prefer it raw." Oh, yummy - raw humps!

Well that was last December - and I distinctly remember chuckling at the time. Then yesterday, I come across this. "Wow," I say to self, "seems Australia has abandoned the 'eat camel and eat it often' strategy." Obviously "Operation: Slip another hump on the barbie" has failed - the Aussie palate has not embraced camel kabob's and, as a result, the camel population keeps burgeoning. Oh no, what to do, what to do? Hm, well, apparently THIS: "Thousands of camels in Australia's remote Outback could be killed by marksmen in helicopters under a government proposal aimed at cutting down the population of the havoc-wreaking creatures. [....] Besides sending in sharpshooters in helicopters and on foot, officials are considering proposals to turn some of the creatures into tasty treats such as camel burgers." Oh, yummy, a win-win, can a McDonald's McCamel be far behind?

As for bullets raining down from the sky? Is it a inhumane approach? Well no worries, Tony Peacock, CEO of the University of Canberra's Invasive Animals Cooperative Research Center, laid all such concerns to rest when averred: "To be shot from a helicopter is actually quite humane, ... If I was a camel, I'd prefer to just get it in the head."

Clearly, in Australia, the only good camel is a dead camel.

Wonder if they need any recruits? I hear there's a newly unemployed pro-aerial hunting crazy from Alaska who would be a perfect fit - maybe she's interested?