Wednesday, April 22, 2009

"The Bruinooge Report": A Hamster's Delight

Oh freaking happy day!

Here in South Winnipeg my copy of Tory MP Rod Bruinooge's "Parliamentary Report" has arrived in the mail.

Whew! And here I was worried I would have nothing to line our Tory's cage with this week.

You see, "Tory" (our pea-brained shit-eating hamster) likes having the "Bruinooge Report" placed under its shavings.

A pleasant departure from the regular facile offerings of the Winnipeg Free Press, it gives our rodent something different to dig up and read during its downtime. The fact that our beloved four legged rodent then proceeds to gleefully crap all over the content of the "Bruinooge Report" is, I am sure, merely a coincidence. But I have to say, "Tory" does seem happier when he has Bruinooge's partisan pablum to keep him company.

If nothing else, at least Rod's 17" x 11" eight paged dark blue-hued offering is good for something: it improves the quality of life of our caged animals.


  1. Hahaha!

    I had been wondering why Mr. Bruinooge had stopped spamming the Yukon with his idiotic proselytizing flyers, which came so frequently in the mail up until the last federal election. The guineas have been longing for a fresh cage-liner. Perhaps he's been too busy penning "parlimentary reports" for his doting constituents?
    Who the hell is Rod Bruinooge, MP?Fortunately, one of Mr. Bruinooge's thoughtful colleagues up on the Hill has recently taken over his junk-mail duties for the Yukon. The first of these new delightful diatribes arrived in the mail this week.

  2. That's funny and a great idea I might add - our little shit-eater just passed so I'm at a loss what to do with these things now.

  3. I can't stand that apple. Really works against aboriginals having fakes like him and that idiot senator Brazeau pretending to represent First Nations.

    I know this is a stupid question - but did R.B. have anything noteworthy to say?

  4. @ Rachel - the number of trees killed in the name of Tory mailouts is a travesty.

    @ Left Nut - no rodent any long? Use them to wrap fish.

    @ Jesus - Bruinooge "noteworthy"? Well on the up side there is a pic of RB with his newborn child Luke. He also promises that via the Harpo's Economic Action Plan that "Manitoba will emerge from this global recession with better infrastructure, a more skilled labour force, lower taxes and a more competitive economy." Glory be to heaven we are saved!

    He also hypes the Home Renovation Tax Credit and the Tax Free Savings Account (TFSA) BECAUSE - don't ya know, "Everybody loves free money! That's why the Tax Savings Account is such an excellent financial tool."

    But, Jesus, the most disconcerting thing about RB's report is news that "Rod starts a new Post-Secondary Education Caucus." Apparently it is a Conservative caucus dedicated to seeing "how the government and [Tory] MP's can best serve" universities by meeting with administrators and sharing ideas with student organizations - (i.e. brainwashing). Aside from that - it is full of pictures of Bruinnoge meeting this, that, or the other obligatory demographic here Wpg South.

  5. The brainwashing has been going on from the left side of the column as they've been indoctrinating students for years so it's no surprise the right would try to muscle in on the territory. Honestly it will take more than "sharing ideas" to change any of that. The recent Fletcher story shows that.

    No "Economic Action Plan" by any Ottawa Tory or Liberal will help Manitoba as long as the NDP & Doer are in office holding the purse strings.

    Bruinooge needs to pay more attention to his riding. Alcock has been making a lot of media appearances lately which could possibly mean Round III.

  6. Dear Lone Fat Arse,

    Love your Blog and its contributor comments!

    Clare L. Pieuk

  7. @ Clare,

    Thanks look forward to you visiting again.

  8. Rod Bruinooge starting a Post-Secondary Education caucus?

    The first thing I thought of when I saw that was this:

    "While recordings are available from only the Waterloo workshop, the OPCCA and the Manning Foundation have held similar Conservative training sessions on campuses in Ottawa, Toronto, London, Halifax and Winnipeg."

    I wonder, was Rod Bruinooge behind those idiots who ran for UMSU this year (and suffered the worst loss that I can remember since... last year's idiot conservative slate) and their dirty tricks?

  9. Having lived in his riding through 2006, Rod struck me as one of those go-getters who buys into Conservative brand appeal. You know, that fashionable water cooler Conservatism people wear as a career move.

    Rod substitutes intelligence with belligerence.

    He also has no idea what he's really doing. I'd love to listen to his internal monologue.

  10. If only your garbage hit every household 30 time a year like Bruinooge's.